Me

I am not limited to the boundaries of Earth. I have walked over vast expanses of land, I journey through time and space. I have been to the final frontier, and back. Dragons do not scare me, demons cower in fear of my righteous weapons. Despite the vast hordes which rally against me, I emerge from battle with the refreshing feeling of having just stepped out of the shower.

I am a philosopher, a writer, an artist, and the world's finest at tactical thumb wrestling. I have inspired dozens with the call of my war-cry and have never been truant in attending daily life. I communicate with machines and tolerate the lack of Grecian cuisine within my diet. Never have I been accused of loitering, manslaughter, or un-gentlemanly conduct.

Despite numerous injuries against my soul, I have patched it up and refilled it with more joy than it started with. I once beat a plethora of beastly creatures with only my bare feet and a large hammer. Finding time to myself is a challenge I undertake once every ten weeks, and often involves the task of wrestling with slightly deranged Germans and enthusiastic Irishmen. I can create worlds with only two ingredients.

I once nearly suffocated, only to realize that I have the unique power to breathe normally when out of the water. I have moved earth and water and several tons of plastic and cardboard all without breaking a sweat.  Small rubber balls hold no power over me. 

I have traveled through time and have never killed a butterfly. Felines find me to be irresistible. I have saved several universes several times over yet still have the patience to tend to a farm as well as breed and raise small animals. I have survived the constant chatter of my sister.

My glasses are simply an accessory for accentuating my attractiveness. I have allies in Brazil and rivals in Kentucky. I have spent years with a family I have never met. Out of the only three substances which can kill me, I have allowed one to continue to exist simply because I can. Overcast days are comforting to me, I have lived with the ocean as my backyard and the wilderness as my lawn.

I have crept in cracks, leapt in rivers, and avoided the need of keeping a steady job. I dance in the dark and value my friends for who they are. My mind is right, my soul is light and my heart is just a tiny bit lonely. The only time I ever need to eat is when I get hungry. I play both chess and poker at the same time and still manage to win.

I just now begin to realize that of all the worlds I have traveled, only this one requires me to engage in traversing the landscape of my mind.


This is me.